Oh the Horror…


Porcelain dolls are just so PorcelainDollfrom Helll6*shiver* incredibly creepy. What is it that makes some women be drawn to them? Their lifeless staring eyes? Their evil “If you only knew what I had in store for you when you go to sleep tonight” smiles?

When I was a child, maybe about seven or eight years old, I went on a cross country drive to Oklahoma with my grandparents. There was some horror movie that was coming out soon and they were running the heck out of the ad for it. I must have seen it a bunch of times in various hotel rooms across the country and then in my great Aunt’s house in Oklahoma. I know nothing about the movie, but I do distinctly remember that an evil porcelain doll with a lifeless bloodthirsty smile on its little puckered lips figured PorcelainDollfromHell8prominently in that commercial and forever after in my nightmares.

I mean just look at that. What would make you want to bring that into your home? How can you NOT have nightmares knowing that thing is sitting in your living room. Or worse yet sharing your bedroom with you?  It’s like voluntarily opening up a portal to hell in your home.

So listen up ladies. This is your warning. Rid yourself of this strange obsession. Destroy the little demons wrapped in china and repent. Otherwise when you least expect it those evil little dolls are going to ruin your day. And when that happens don”t say I didn’t warn ya.